MTC

My mind is still reeling from work tonight. I LOVE MY JOB!!!

Reasons?

1. There are two missionaries (SPANISH) going to Fort Worth on the floor that I work on... and I get to go say hi to them every time I get to work. They love me, I love them... and I've got them so pumped up for Texas. We even got a picture together to show President Thurston. He will eat that up. We also figured out that I will be the sister's great-grandmother.

2. There are people that come to that chat to talk to me. YES! I am there for a reason.. and there are people that I just connect with... right away. It's so amazing being a missionary again.

3. I love the people I work with. They're all so good... and so fun. We're pretty good at keeping each other awake.

4. It keeps me on my toes. It's been a while since I've had to answer some of those hard questions!

5. I remember what's most important.

6. I get to share what I know and LOVE with the whole world!

7. Tengo mas oportunidades para hablar en español...

Those are just a few I can think of tonight. Looks like I'm getting really into lists... Liel warned me about this...

Acceptance

So, sometimes I get these ideas and I can't sleep until I get them written down... tonight is one of those nights. I'd like to think it's the mark of a writer, but it could be that I'm just ADD.

I was just thinking about this complex everyone has about being "accepted." I mean, it seems like that's the main goal, right? No one wants to be the odd one out, or heaven forbid... Different. Even though I probably always pretended not to care, I'm sure it has always been a desire of mine (though not always a realization).

But the only person that really has to accept me is me. (Actually, that's not true, because I also need to be accepted by God, but that's in a different way and for a different blog post..)

At the same time, I can't just say "This is who I am, and I can't change." I limit myself when I do that. Why put myself in a box?

So I was thinking about some things I've just accepted about myself. Not saying I couldn't change them if I wanted... but this is me. I've accepted it!

1. I have freckles. I remember as a child one of my great-aunts asking me if I had tried to wash them off... I hadn't. And I didn't. I love them. Maybe it's because I had another great-aunt tell me they were angel kisses (I liked her better anyway).

2. I'm not a size 2. I'm over it.

3. I'm not exactly what you would call a "natural athlete..." I do, however, have a gift for getting hit in the head with soccer balls.

4. I like to read. Given the choice to read or getting hit in the head by one of those soccer balls... I will choose the former. Every time.

5. In reference to number 4... I'm a nerd. Accepted.

6. In reference to number 5... I have a dream of someday attending Hogwarts.

7. I really like being on time (even to the point of neurotic at times). I think this trend switches every other generation... My grandpa is a Nazi about being on time... and my mom is pretty much the opposite. Hence, it's my turn to get those punctual urges.

8. I'm average height... well, more like short. Pluses? I can pretty much always get away with high heels. All boys are tall to me. I never have to worry about my pants being too short.

9. I'm a lover. Not a fighter.

10. I guess 10 is a good round number... I'm pretty dang good at making awkward situations. And let's face it... I love them. (It's like the chicken and the egg... do I love them because I make them so often, or do I make them so often because I love them?)

And that's me.

Angels

So, awesome night tonight at the RC. I was chatting tonight with this really cool guy who is going through a rough time. I will call him "Jim" for privacy's sake. We chatted last night also, and he is just really neat because he wants to learn all he can about everything.

Funny parts first.

Funny part #1-He tells me that he cannot keep secrets, or, in other words, he cannot lie. So he always tells the truth (and I honestly believe him about that one). So, when he tells me he will go to church every Sunday, it's true! I also get to have him call me out when I tell him he read one my favorite chapters in the Book of Mormon ("You would have said that about any of them...")

Funny part #2-So, yesterday, I taught him a little about baptism. I taught him that part of baptism is that we cover our whole bodies in water. So, today, I guess he was feeling a little sick. He told me he got in his tub, and covered his body completely in water, so he would have God with him. Yes, he tried to baptize himself. Or something like that.

On a more serious note...

Well, he is Hindu, but tonight I was teaching him about Jesus Christ. As I was teaching him that Jesus Christ paid the price for our sins, because of his love for us, and Jim told me that he was crying. I asked him if he believed that Jesus Christ was real, and he said yes. It was the most amazing feeling ever. And then, on top of that, Jim asked me at the end of our conversation why God sends angels to the earth. I told him there were various reasons, including to instruct people, or to warn them. At that point he told me, "You are an angel for me too." Wow. Haven't gotten that one in a while :) Just thought I'd share the moment that made my life tonight.

Did I mention I have the best job ever?

Elder Maxwell & BY. They get it.

"'Sometimes I think it quite strange that the children of men are so constituted as to need to be taught one lesson all the time, and again it is not so marvellous to me, when I reflect upon … the designed effect … of this state of probation. Men are organized to be independent in their sphere, … yet they have, as soldiers term it, to run the gauntlet all the time. They are organized to be just as independent as any being in eternity, but that independency … must be proved and tried while in this state of existence, must be operated upon by the good and the evil' (Brigham Young in Journal of Discourses, 3:316).

"So often in life a deserved blessing is quickly followed by a needed stretching. Spiritual exhilaration may be quickly followed by a vexation or temptation. Were it otherwise, extended spiritual reveries or immunities from adversity might induce in us a regrettable forgetfulness of others in deep need. The sharp, side-by-side contrast of the sweet and the bitter is essential until the very end of this brief, mortal experience. Meanwhile, even routine, daily life provides sufficient sandpaper to smooth our crustiness and polish our rough edges, if we are meek." -Elder Neal A. Maxwell, Enduring Well

Could I have a better job?

The answer to that is: No.

Leaving

So lately I've been thinking about the concept of "leaving." And not just leaving, but being left out, left behind, missing out, or just the concept of change in general. It's the whole "the grass is greener" or "you don't know what you have until you've lost it" mentality. It's quite the phenomenon, I think.

I'm pretty sure I tried to cherish every day of my mission. Granted, there were days that were more difficult than others. However, I knew the day would come that it would end and I knew that that would be a hard day. And I suppose that day came sooner than I thought it would. In fact, it came every time I had to leave an area. As soon as I would get that transfer call, I felt like everything was going on without me... that there were all these happenings that I helped to bring about, and that I wasn't going to get to be a part of them any more. It didn't matter if there was practically nothing going on; there was always something that I knew I would be left out of.

Seems that this is human nature! Looking back, I even felt that way graduating from high school! And heavens, I would not go back now for the world (though I would probably get that 4.0 I always wanted). Why? Because I've experienced better things. I was scared to leave, I thought I would miss out on things... but little did I know, there was so much more waiting for me on the other side.

And thus it is with my current situation. I have been working at a college advisement center for a year now. It's been a good job, but I've felt the need lately to move on. So I decided to apply at the Missionary Training Center (MTC), because it's been my dream, ever since I went there myself, to be an MTC teacher. And guess what? I got a job! I couldn't be more excited! However, then I started looking at my current job with this whole new perspective... (aka, how much I was going to be leaving behind). Then I had to stop myself! Of course there would be things I would be leaving behind... but amazing things are waiting for me at the MTC. It's time for growth. It's time for change.

Having fun with my Mac camera

You might think... "Is she really that vain?"

No comment.

What Love Is

Love is a certain inborn suffering derived from the sight of and excessive meditation upon the beauty of the opposite sex, which causes each one to wish above all things the embraces of the other and by common desire to carry out all of love's precepts in the other's embrace.

Thank you, Andreas Capellanus.